Sugar Overload

Ok....don't get me wrong. I love me a great cake smash...













{Davin when he was just a wee one...where in the world has the time gone?}

But I'm seriously on a sugar overload and I think my magic plexi (to keep the floor clean) is about to crack!

I've had an influx of Oct/November babies in the studio and let me just say, I never thought I'd get tired of the cake!

Ok....fair enough. I'm not really tired of it, there's nothing better than seeing a baby stick their foot into a mound of cake....
















but I'm a little over the cleanup. The laundry has been a tad overwhelming!


I have been a bit nostalgic- especially with the kiddos that I have been photographing since they were brand new (like this little one)




















(forgive the straight out of the camera shot, and the repeat on the tutu....I don't think I'm going to edit the drool though!)

But I think I'm ready to move back to newborns. I can't wait to snuggle my brand new niece next Tuesday and get all kinds of itty bitty baby shots!

So...Now What?

I keep asking myself that. In the scope of so many different parts of my life.

We've been married for 2 years, now what? My toddler is active and out of control (sometimes in a good way), now what? I have this business, that I love with all of my heart and put a large amount of energy into, now what? I've poured all of my time and talents into two wonderful charities to try and make a difference, now what?

From another perspective, it would seem as if I should just float. Exist. Be happy the way things are....but I feel as if I've run up against a brick wall.

Obviously, no photographer ever "made it" by just staying stagnant. Taking the same pictures, charging the same prices, going to the same locations.....you get the "picture" (ha ha)

I know many aspiring photographers in my life that would tell me, "you should just be happy with the business you get" and, "you're so lucky to be able to shoot more than once a week". But luck really has nothing to do with it, in my opinion. I've worked my butt off, invested a ton of money and above all- poured everything I had into gaining the knowledge to compose a well exposed and creative photograph.

On the flip side, I had a NILMDTS colleague tell me this weekend that the prices I charge for prints are absurd. That if I continue to charge these prices and then raise them at some point, my clients will have sticker shock. I was told that just because I'm not a "full time studio" now, does not mean I should undercut myself or treat myself as anything less than a prized professional photographer.

It's such a hard balance in between the hobbyist turned small business owner and the cutthroat diehard photography buffs. We never agree, on anything. Especially pricing.

I just feel like, "where do I go from here". I want to be successful but that doesn't completely mean money for me. I want to give back and that dips into the small profit I do incurr. I want to grow as a photographer and seize every opportunity I can to learn and create and yet....I feel as if I'm doing things the wrong way sometimes.

I wish someone would write the manual on being a "professional artist" (the quotes mean it's a joke)

NILMDTS & Fetal Hope Walk

Today was a day that just complimented itself.

I thought I might be crazy for agreeing to do a 5k right before going to a training for NILMDTS (Now I Lay Me Down to Sleep for the newbs). I must admit, it did feel kind of crazy getting up early to go "run" (I'm not sure I did much running actually) when I had another long engagement to attend afterwords, but they sure did compliment each other.

So...we did the Children's Hospital Fetal Hope Walk. I had to help pimp my favorite mommy site (mom's like me denver, woot) and hey, who can resist free hoodies for both mom AND baby!?

but I was secretly hoping that I would run into a family that I knew was there. Not just any family, mind you....a family that I had photographed through the Now I Lay Me Down to Sleep foundation. This amazing family was connected to me through a long time friend and although I had never met them before the session, they became like family to me the minute I walked into their hospital room.

As NILMDTS photogs, we hardly ever get to build these relationships. I wanted to see them, in a different place...honoring their little angel. And I did!

This is such a special family to me. Not only did it bring me closer to the family member I already knew, but I just felt their warmth and love all over me- at the hospital and again today.



Then, off to the Now I Lay Me Down to Sleep training for Area Coordinators. There was a lot to talk about and a lot to take in. So many areas in need of better structure, so many horror stories about bad situations between photographers competing with one another and not willing to service these families because of the air of competition in the business. Maybe I'm spoiled, but it just shocked me to hear about how selfish some of these photographers were....only using NILMDTS for personal gain or promotion. Never willing to put the competition aside to give these gifts....

My morning complimented my afternoon/evening. Every time I heard a story from the AC's around the country about bad situations in their area or things going wrong in the organization...I clung to this family. I clung to the love they've shown me and the appreciation I've felt from them since the day I set foot in the hospital to photograph them.

I came home on a mission....to bring new structure and energy to my area. To share these stories to other photographers. As I told the mother of this angel, "It's not a happy ending, but a happy tangent" and she replied, "It's all a part of his story".

It is true, that these stories never end.

But....I Can't Just Take a Picture Anymore!

So, I've been thinking about starting a blog to go with my site for awhile now. I was just having a hard time coming up with exactly what I would write about. Of course, I could tell everyone how I photograph the way that I do- but it seems odd to me that anyone would want to do what I do. For those who are passionate about photography, I find it so much more rewarding to find your own style. See through your own eyes...

ANYWAYS, last Friday gave me an insight about a first topic. It made me laugh and I'm sure hundreds of other photogs can relate.

My friend Alix and I went to go see Sandy Puc's Tot's to Teens seminar. On one of the breaks, we were chatting about all of the different aspects of a photo- getting exposure right, white balance, etc. She mentioned the phenomena of, "I just can't take a picture anymore!"

I laughed. It's so true. Any aspiring photographer or pro knows exactly what we were talking about...

Remember the days when you could just snap a photo? On a point and shoot, disposable, whatever kind of camera you had in your hand. You got the subject in the photo, yelled cheese and that was that. The photo eventually got developed or put on the internet and everyone reminisced about how fun that event was...

Fast forward to when you start to pursue photography. Someone yells, "take a picture" and you frantically search for your high resolution DSLR. Wait, you can't take the photo without your hot shoe flash, god forbid you make the rookie mistake of shooting with your on board flash. Set it to manual, there's no way you're going to screw up using an automatic setting! Make sure your ISO, Aperture and Shutter speed are perfect....uh oh did you forget to set your white balance? Are you shooting in raw? Is your focus sharp? ARE YOU POINTING THE CAMERA AT THE RIGHT LEVEL!?!?

It's insane but it's impossible to "just take a photo". Not to mention the time you may spend correcting things in Photoshop afterwards.

Gone are the days of the snapshot.

(Now...my husband makes me pull out the point and shoot when our son is doing something cute)